I'm Katie O'Connor and I am, among other things, a writer of romance and erotica. I live in the Great White North, Canada.
I love playing with words. I blog about any thing and everything that pops into my head.
Someday I want to publish a mixed genre novel. It is going to be an erotic, shape shifter, vampire, steampunk, sci-fi, murder mystery, adventure, romantic, western, historical thriller. It will be my biography.
Warning: On occasion I post things of an adult nature.
Before I begin today’s whine, let me
be perfectly clear in stating that I love my life.
general rule, I’m a fairly busy person. I work a regular job four days a week.
I have a small but thriving home business. I’m a wife and mother and recently
became a grandmother and I adore spending time with the new baby. Then there is
the whole writing gig which tends to consume a lot of time. Add to all of this
cat-sitting two cats in addition to my own two and the accompanying
screech-fest fights. Just before Thanksgiving, I dropped my phone in the toilet
and last week the hard-drive on my laptop crapped out.I was unaware of how much stress was building
under my skin and how tightly wound I was becoming.
consider myself a particularly giving person and didn’t think that I was
spending too much time away from my studio which is where I unwind. But in
hind-sight it seems that was the case.
I’ve had this almost uncontrollable urge to purge the clutter from my life.
We’re talking major reduction of personal items. Knick knacks, books, games,
furniture, dishes, clothing, shoes the whole shooting match. I was even going
to sell the piano that hasn’t been played for 15 years, and it was a gift from
my Grandmother. I debated starting to purge things from my studio. It takes
something radical to make me even consider cleaning the studio, let alone
reducing the creative mess. I work best in a cluttered, rather untidy space. It
ago I was told that the urge to purge or to re-arrange furniture (which I excel
at) are signs of stress. When a person can’t control their lives, they try to
control their environment. It makes sense to me. For the years I was basically
living alone and raising our children while my man worked out of town, the
furniture got shuffled a LOT. And I had the cleanest cupboards and closets in
the Northern Hemisphere.
had forgotten this fact until I was talking to my friend Linda about the urge
to purge things. She immediately chalked it up to stress and the need to
control what’s going on around me. It was a light-bulb moment, I kid you not. Another
friend informed me that I need to get out more. I laughed at him, I was certain
that I was getting out enough. Then he said that baby time and going to work
doesn’t count as “out time.” Their voices echoed in my head and I resisted the
urge to fill a dumpster with my possessions and tried to figure out how to
de-stress. Frankly, I came up with nothing. So things continued on in the
brings us to tonight; I needed to make a quick trip to Wal-Mart to print off
some pictures to send to my folks and for my Gramma’s album of adorable shots
of the new wee baby. Typically, I wouldn’t be caught dead shopping on the
weekend, it is just too busy. But, I’ve been procrastinating printing the
pictures and my man needed some cold meds, so off I trotted.
evening was full of pleasant surprises. First, the snow brushed off the car
easily with no ice to scrape. Second, the roads were wet, not slippery. Third,
the Wal-Mart parking lot was empty and that NEVER happens. With each little
victory, my shoulders relaxed and I felt myself unwind. I do love it when
things go right!
I entered the store and it was
dead. For the first time in years, the staff outnumbered the customers. Sweet!
So I printed my pictures and had a lovely chat with the cutest five year old
girl and the lady running the photo studio. Then I started my shopping. My plan
for a quick in and out trip receded quickly. The isles were empty as I toured
the store. I wandered up and down every single isle; I even visited automotive
and sporting goods. I found the things I needed, grabbed myself a couple of
cute skirts and some other un-needed things; things just for me!
time I got to the line-free register, I was grinning like a damned fool.
I was happy! I hadn’t realized the extent of the stress that had crept up on me,
or that it was starting to make me feel unhappy. I don’t know how to explain
this, if you knew me, you would know that I HATE, DETEST and ABHORE shopping in
all its many forms. Yet tonight, wandering around that deserted store with no
place to be and nobody making demands on my time I found a strange peace. What
should have been 40 minutes there and back turned into almost two and a half
hours and I came home smiling and content.
still going to do some purging, but perhaps without so much haste and a little
more discretion. The creative items in my studio are safe for a while longer,
although I still think the piano needs to go.
reflection, it’s funny how the stress just kind of crept up on me, and then
just slipped away when I took a little time for myself.